Introspection

Happy new month Loves! Introspection has been my theme for the last couple of months.

I will explain why in just a bit. Y’all remember the Keepsakes and memories series; I am getting back to it. But I will be using the keywords for a month; for example, for May, the post is about introspection. This post is inspired by Boho Berry. Here’s some May Introspection!

Feel free to share your two cents on the few things you agree or disagree on in the comment section.

 

As of May, I learned that there’s SOMETHING I NEED SERIOUS HELP WITH. How to eat an elephant? An elephant is symbolic of the big goal in our minds. Sometimes, I get stuck in the process of eating that elephant. In as much as I take bit sized portions of the tasks, I need help. Regarding content that can help me get unstuck. Share with me how do you do it!

Last May showed me that I’M SELF-CONSCIOUS ABOUT performing my poetry. I have not written a poem for so long, I am not sure I remember how unless it’s like eating matooke, the persistent Nairobi rains or being with you! (Vibe squad take notes I got you)

Last May, so many SMALL THINGS HAVE GOT ME SUPER EXCITED. First off, the readers that comment, thank you for this making relationship work. Guys, communication is everything. Ask anyone in love.

Also, I landed myself a collaboration with a blogger I truly look up to, look out for some eye candy come September. WHAT LIGHTS YOU UP?

“Still I rise ” remain as the WORDS I LIVE BY as of last year, December 3rd. (My birthday)

Last May, IF I KNEW I COULD NOT FAIL then I would have shot my shot at becoming First Lady of the Republic of (Uganda or Kenya) I don’t know. I digress but yes!

If there’s anything I have learned that I’M AFRAID TO ASK FOR its somewhere in the post below.

Happy, Magical, Ecstatic, Blessed, more intentional are five WORDS THAT DESCRIBE ME BEST OVER the last 31 days. (don’t go back and count, I know they are more than five.

THE CORE REASON BEHIND MY HAPPINESS is seeing how resilient I have become. Usually, I am my friends’ punching bag (no new friends) but this time I had a punching bag. Thanks to my PR, you’ll be anonymous for this post. I know you are reading this and I want to thank you for truly staying and making time for me when everyone else was too busy making excuses.

If there’s anything I FORGIVE MYSELF FOR, it ’s refusing to bet on myself. Forgiving myself has mainly inspired by my current read How to be a bawse by Lilly Singh.

I NO LONGER NEED toxicity. After watching This is Ess’ YouTube video, I discovered mentally tough people like you and myself end up attracting toxic people. I won’t give you spoilers, go ahead, and watch the video. (Thank me later)

My ADVICE FOR ME in the past couple of months is still my mantra STILL I RISE by my Auntie Maya Angelou (RIP).

MY VERSION OF “ENOUGH” as of May looks like service in terms of living a life with no regrets. Sometimes it’s as subtle as spending time with people who feel like sunshine. You are the Ying to my Yang. Also, Lewis Howes’ Podcasts have been a great plug for me.

May has shown me a lot in terms of WHAT I LOVE ABOUT MY LIFE. (away from all the ideas and coming to terms with reality) is the gift of family wow, I won’t talk about it because can’t see what I am typing. It’s raining in my eyes. You are the Addis to my Ababa. (Okay, I hear you, I ‘ll stop with the vibes)

I am proud to say I am TAKING MORE CARE OF ME especially in terms of my mental health listening to so many podcasts on self-care. A friend has also suggested a couple of audio books I can share with the rest of the sapiosexuals (out there) in the comment section.

MY SUPPORT SYSTEM, you (who is reading this post) guys are the best. I am also bragging to my friends how God gave me the best blog family. Especially the ones that slid into my DMs where we share nitty-gritty aspects on a popular topic on the blog. I am rooting for guys because I have learned from the best.

SAYING YES to love! My brother must be excited if he’s reading this, he’s getting camels and giraffes soon. What I mean is exuding passion in everything I set my hands to and heart. I AM THROWING MY HEART over the bar; the rest of my body will catch up.

SAYING NO to all enemies of progress. A few friendship ties have been cut. I am saying no to pretending we’ re in this together kumbe* I am alone in this movie. Real talk!

JOURNALING has helped me in terms of self-discovery, exercise my writing my muscle as well as reading the Word of God. Also allow me to show off how the phenomenal PIA POETS, Ezekiel Anzonwu and Chris Webb were in Nairobi. Let me just say, if you know less about you, you’ll doubt yourself more. You are royalty, marvelous are the works of God’s hands and that my soul knows very well. Can I get an amen?

The list of PEOPLE I LOOK UP TO has grown over the last 31 days has grown. Its length is if the Standard Gauge Railway. They possess the rarest qualities of unbridled passion, tenacity. In as much as they have made it, they are still down to earth.

I think I have finally figured out HOW I WOULD LIKE TO BE REMEMBERED. “Mugabi, she was magic!”

The walls I have built around me are the ONE THING I’D LIKE TO CHANGE about me. You know the saying; once bitten twice shy!

Tea and my own company haven’t been so sabotaging after all. Only foodies get this. If anything, it has taught me to FEEL AT PEACE.

The LIMITING BELIEFS have become a skewed vision over the last 31 days. Being at school has engraved grit within me. Although,  there was a point when I honestly contemplated dropping out of school. Yes, even this year. Then, I remembered why I started and that kept me going. (its cliché, but it always works for me)

SETTING BOUNDARIES has come in handy for me. I am trying 30 minutes of social media only. Some days, I have to mute all notifications for some of my fave apps. Is there an application for that though?

May has taught me to reaffirm this; I BELIEVE I DESERVE the best especially because I have put my best foot forward. If you want crappy things to stop happening to you, stop accepting crap and put your best foot forward. Man, the month of May was basically for setting myself up for success. I have been on the grind for my books and poetry, but I must be twice as good this June now daily.

If there’s anything I have learned that I’M AFRAID TO ASK FOR its somewhere in the post below.

I AM NOT holding on to things that don’t add value to my life. I really wish the world was just unicorns and confetti some days. Some people, I am sorry on behalf who hurt you what!

I am LISTENING TO MY INTUITION! I am a woman, what’s your super power! Hold your horses about being a feminist, I have always just wanted to use that line.

As of May, I realized that I’VE BEEN PROCRASTINATING ON creating YouTube content. Because I have been doubting myself among other things. I hope to start as soon as July ends (the procrastinator in me is talking)!

Love over Ego! Mind over matter! Choosing me are my key LESSONS LEARNED as of May!

Have you learned any lessons throughout May, the month of introspection?

Photo Credit; Pop Up Studio Kenya.

12 Comments

  1. What I learnt in May you ask? Well, in May I learned that not everyone is for you, not everyone is riding for you some are just in the car with you because the ride is free. As soon as you park they’re all about them you’re all about them n no one is about you, so you have to be for and about you.

    • Patsy Mugabi

      Thank you for this subtle honest! We keep riding on and enjoy the journey ahead of us!

  2. Faith Wacha

    Amazing as always!! Feel free to share deets on that kikoyi jumpsuit though!

  3. Tony Gitice

    Oh wow! This is really nice. Grabbing the bull by the neck huh?!(Just made that up-I think. Lol) May June but full of nothing but bliss. Cheers!

    • Patsy Mugabi

      Thank you for stopping by on this little corner of the internet Tony!Blissful 31 days ahead of us!

    • Patsy Mugabi

      Yes, that I am! The diva in me demands to be heard.
      Thank you, Roland!

  4. Pattttsss. I wish you all the best as you continue to discover yourself and become the best version of you……..Thanks for the insight. those Lewis Howes podcasts btw……good stuff.

    • Patsy Mugabi

      Thank you Cate for making the time to read this.I cannot wait to hear which podcast by Lewis stood out for you!

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